Hold

While you still upset me doesn't mean I am not over you;you have a hold only because I still relive the betrayal and absurd lies, and I regret all the things I have done for the wrong person.

Removal

I ought to have faith that it is a blessing. I believe it's divine intervention: a shield from thorns, a channel out of a rotten core, a trail to freedom.

The true truth

Actually there had never been a need ever to find out or know the truth. Because while it perhaps matters now for whatever reason, it will not matter anymore. And to some, it never mattered. A cherry on the icing: To all of you who still have a choice, which story do you prefer? I am forced to believe there is no Richard Parker. Simply because I cannot unknow what has been known.

The month after

It's been a month since. Much was learnt in just these 4 weeks. I learnt that not everyone cares about the truth. Not everyone values integrity. Not everyone understands. At the same time, I am consoled by friends who understand, with some having gone through a similar plight; I am proud that I have lived by integrity, and to be in the company of friends who hold similar values; I am blessed to have friends who care, each in their own way, regardless of their opinion on what happened. I thank those that helped me grow, and those that soothed me so. Friends come to you for 2 reasons: Either they want something from you, or they have something to offer to you. I count my blessings give thanks for the latter.

On friends

I'd rather a friend who would tell and teach me right from wrong. One that attempts to show me both sides when I'm undecided. I have doubts about those that simply state "I'll support whatever decision you make." On the surface they may seem supportive, at the same time I can't help but to feel if I had chosen wrong path, would they still support my decision and let me perish? Or perhaps they will wait and only to save me in the nick of time?

Forbidden fruit

Had thought back about what happened and got reminded of the story of Adam and the apple.

New and old

It was an eventful week that ended nicely with the arrival of my new scooter. Excited much, I was. With my new ride and restored freedom to travel around again. As I tested out my new ride, I realised I had been subconsciously comparing this new scooter I bought for myself against the old one lent to me. The throttle was more responsive, brakes were more effective, handling was smoother. Having owned this new scooter for the very first time also meant that I had to start from ground zero, with the documentations, with the maintenance and grooming. I was actually contented with the old scooter, despite not being the owner, riding it as the number N-th rider. I would have probably continued with it, if not for the fact that circumstances require I return the scooter. Then again if not for that, I wouldn't have gotten a new one only to realise it was better in so many ways, and most importantly, it was truly mine and not a loan that might just be taken back anytime.